a gift and a blessing

wearing my nani’s earrings, my dadi’s shawl, my mama’s bangles, and my handstitched linen.

offered this blessing to my dear friends on the occasion of their wedding:

when we embark on something new, when we want to do it well, I think we have to face the fear of its opposite, learn how to do that well. for a life well lived, we ask what makes a good death. so in relationship, togetherness, marriage, we should turn to lessons of conflict, loneliness, heartbreak.

adrienne maree brown says about conflict: “we tend to slip out of togetherness the way we slip out of the womb — bloody and messy and surprised to be alone. And clever — able to learn with our whole bodies the ways of the world.”

so, as you take your next seven steps of marriage together, seven blessings in hand, what I offer you is a discipline of care — a delicious practice of nourishing each other. what I hope for you is that when you find yourselves slipping out of togetherness, the path back towards each other is well worn, easy to find, and one you can choose with your whole bodies.